Germ collectors

I’m quite odd about some things. Many people would say I’m just odd, period, but that’s not quite accurate. Getting off track, sorry.

So. I’m not much into germs. I can handle untidy or messy, but cannot stomach dirty. The problem this creates for me is there are many germ collectors we come into contact with every day, but never think of them as such. We only see them as every day items provided for every day activities.

Here is but a short list:

Shopping trolleys:
How the hell do you know what type of person had it before you? Were they sick? Did they pick their nose immediately prior to grabbing the trolley? Perhaps they sneezed all over the handle? Did they wash their hands after going to the toilet? Did they wash their hands after jerking off the other half before they left the house?

Money: Have you ever looked at your hands after counting all that spare change you keep in a bowl or jar? I can just about guarantee they’ll be putrid! Can you imagine being a bank teller? It would be one of the few clerical jobs where you would need to wash your hands BEFORE you go to the toilet I’m thinking.

Magazines in the doctors waiting room: The next time you’re in the waiting room, look around and see how many people lick their finger or thumb before they turn the page! Given this is a place where sick people congregate, there is now way I’m EVER reading a magazine while I’m waiting to see the doctor.

Public toilet seats: Now, this a place we put one of the most sensitive parts of our bodies! Have you ever thought about the person who may have been sitting there before you? The diseases they could have? Not for nothing do we have those little antiseptic wipes on the wall of the cubicle. For pity’s sake, use them before you even think about sitting down! I’d hate to see you go for a pee and exit with some type of STD!!! Ok, you may not use a public toilet every day, but when you do it would be nice to survive and be able to tell the tale yes?

Public phones: Now I have a mobile phone, mostly for convenience and family, however NOT having to use a public phone is a bonus! Your mouth is where millions of germs thrive regardless of how hygienic you are, so please don’t think I’m suggesting otherwise ok? The mere THOUGHT of who used that phone before me is the stuff nightmares are made of! There are people who pick their nose and eat the resulting little ball of snot, as disgusting as that thought is. Do you really want to be the next person to put the receiver to your mouth?? I know I don’t.

These are but a few items/activities that most of us use/do almost every single day of our life. It’s a big, bad germy world out there let me say! Scary even!

I’m sure you can think of more to add?

Party poooper?

So I survived a birthday slumber party with several eight and nine year old little girls over this past weekend. Let me just say first off, I quit smoking in January and have rarely craved a shmoke. I dearly wanted one at 6AM this morning as they woke me up screaming and running through the house.

I knew that the girls would be in and out, in and out all day/night long so I didn’t make the house spotless before they came over. Yeah, it was clean. But, it coulda been cleaner, and I wasn’t too afraid knowing that my floors weren’t mopped, and the child’s room wasn’t spotless, and so on. I knew that once they left, I’d have the opportunity to fix and clean everything.

And I didn’t set any rules. No, I didn’t want to throw a bunch of rules at the girls, and expect them to actually listen. I didn’t want to sound like an old, biddy so I let them do what they wanted. Oh my freaking gosh . . . a mad house, I was in a freaking mad house.

I was literally going, OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG .. ! Oh – My – FREAKING – Gosh! Look at my floor! Look at my couch! Look at my kitchen! Oh my poor poor kitchen!!! Don’t worry cabinets, they won’t slam you shut much longer. No, they’re parents will pick them up soon. Oh, ‘fridgerator, don’t cry. The spilled milk on your shelves can be cleaned up. Oh there, there .. let me get it!

I cringed. And I cussed under my breath. I held my breath. I looked away, and covered my eyes. I peeked through my fingers and saw them pillow fighting with my couch cushions, and I was like ohhhh myyyy freeeeaking goshhhh!!

I finally got them all to settle down and eat some breakfast. Cake and ice cream for breakfast, all around! I sugared them up and sent their little butts home. And then I got to cleaning! And I cleaned. And I smiled. And I loved every minute of it.

Vacuum woes

I try to vacuum my house every day, so I was quite heartbroken when my vacuum decided to crap out on me. It was a very reliable vacuum, too. I’ve had it almost 7 years and it’s never given me an ounce of trouble. But gradually, it just started going downhill, not wanting to suck and clean properlly. I was not going to have that, either!

So it farted out, which meant I had a decision to make since buying a new vacuum is not really in my budget .. electricity for the month or a new vacuum. Which one – which one. It was an incredibly hard decision to make, but in the end, I made the ultimate decision of getting a vacuum. I just gotta figure out how I’m going to make use of it in the dark *sigh*

Cleanliness rocks my socks

 

I don’t trust any kind of cleaner that I can’t smell. Take the new Clorox Anywhere spray cleaner mumbojumbo. It’s like water. Water. It has no smell. No color. It’s like spraying water everywhere, and cleaning it off. How do you know for sure that it’s actually clean if you can’t smell the cleanliness?

I like the smell of cleaners. Wood polish, yes please! Windex, over here! Bleach, hells yes. Give me some bleach, and I’m a happy camper. I mop with bleach water. Always. Twice a week. No fail.

A few weeks ago, the daughter came home from being away at her dad’s for a week, and I had just finished mopping the kitchen and bathrooms.

Her: *sniffs around* What’s that smell, Ma?

Me: I just mopped.

Her: Yeah, but what’s the smell? *sniffs more*

Me: It’s bleach.

Her: *big sniffff* Mmm, Mama, it smells soooo goood!

Me: Yes, that’s called cleanliness.

Her: My dad’s house doesn’t smell like cleanliness.

Me: *my heart bursted wide open, smiling from within* No, huh?

Her: No, that’s why I like living here.

Me: Good answer.

:: :: :: Red :: :: ::

Is this person for real?

Due to the nature of the blog (and the name of course) we get lots of searches for info on OCD. I have no problem with this. If people are looking for information, maybe we can help them take the attitude we do. Poke fun at ourselves, discuss it, and help each other feel like we’re NOT freaks.
All of these are good things. It’s called support and being adult enough to admit the way we are.
Now. To the person who searched trying to find out “can my house make me smell bad?” I say this.

The only reason you’re gonna smell is because you don’t wash yourself and your clothes, not your house you imbecile! If your house smells, check the damned rubbish bin! It’s not like a self defrost refrigerator you know! You have to E-M-P-T-Y it

Go buy some soap, turn the tap on (you know, the little thing in the bathroom that turns..it actually has a purpose other than hanging your putrid socks on) and W-A-S-H yourself. Next, try the garbage bin, and lastly, here’s a BIG thought: wash your clothes!!. That big white thing in the laundry has a purpose too!

If none of that works, check your butt. You may have a crusty bit left over from this mornings dump! (see previous tip on soap and water for remedy)

Meantime, take your feral, smelly little self and go away!!! This is NOT the place for you to be I can assure you. More than likely you’ll get beaten half to death with brooms, mops and scrubbing brushes.

I cannot believe that someone actually typed this in to try and find out!

Sheesh!

Nail fetish

I’m a nailbiter. I have done this disgusting habit for as long as I can remember. Heck far, I probably even came out of the womb with fingers in my mouth, trying to chew off nails with my soft gums.

It’s a nervous habit I have. It’s something I do when I’m bored. It’s a time passer for when I’m driving or riding in a car. It’s something I do when I’m waiting, even though I try to be patient, those nails always find their way into my mouth. It’s gross, I know it’s gross and completely unlady-like to chew on fingernails. I know this, I have been made aware of this all throughout my 28 years. I know already!

But, alas, I don’t chew my toenails, as I do know some that do. Oh nooo, my toenails are something completely different. The nails on me toes are always perfect.

Buffed and sanded, moisturized and gleaming. They’re rounded and shaped, oiled and painted. They’re top-coated and beautiful in a deep shade of red. Always. ALWAYS.

Even in the winter time when absolutely noone sees my footsies, my toes are always pretty. And they stay pretty. I make sure of that as I give myself a weekly pedicure. If the paint chips or smudges just a little smidge, just a fraction of a tadbit, I have to do it over again – All the nails. I have to make them perfect, even if noone sees them. I know that there’s a mistake and I just won’t have it. My fingernails may look like shit, but my toes? My toes are perfection.

:: :: :: Red :: :: ::

What the????

What the f**k is with people who leave dirty dishes on the sink?
Flies all over them, crusty bits hanging off, attracting ants and all that shit?
I went visiting someone I know the other day and nearly puked! I didn’t stay for coffee, I got out as quick as a I could. My frigging God, I was worried about getting Ebola or something!
I can live with (some) parts of the house messy, or untidy, for a short while, but I can’t stomach D-I-R-T-Y!
In the day and age of choosing from more cleaning products than a hospital could use in a year, there’s simply no excuse for it. Some people don’t even grasp the concept of what water is for let alone a spray cleaner!
And do NOT get me started on personal hygiene!! Soap and deodorant are reasonably cheap, so I can see NO reason for body odour (nearly spewing just thinking about it!) or for a person to NOT be clean and tidy.
I know we all do sloth now and again, but we still shower right? Use deodorant? Antiperspirant? Wear clean clothes?
Why do people let themselves and their living environments get putrid?
I’m not into disgusting little gutter snipes so get the hell away from me!!